Inlaws…

School is closed because of Ebola but that doesn’t stop people from telling you your son should be in school. A few people have said, you’re in a good position because your son isn’t in school but most people haven’t.

This week my inlaws weighed in and I always find it annoying when people say your son should be in school BECAUSE he’s so smart and doing so well yada yada. Like at least let it be because he couldn’t recognise his name or add up to 10 or sat at home crying all day from loneliness. Success is not its own reward, it is just another stick people use to beat you with ha ha.

Someone at the summer camp said my son would benefit from school because he didn’t sit still well – which I think is true. He is not a good sitter and he definitely sat and followed tasks better after a few days at the camp. Is this what they call socialisation? I’m not sure. That’s something I’ll take on board, I just don’t know how important it is. What do you think?

My inlaws really want my son in school, even though schools are a hotbed of disease and are currently closed because of the Ebola outbreak. I’m not even sure how I will handle this when schools reopen. Some of my anxieties are cultural. In Nigeria inlaw pressure is more of a phenomenon than in the west. As a wife living with inlaws my children belong to the whole family and inlaws have a say in their welfare and expect their input to be taken very seriously. I know my husband will support me on my decision and my inlaws are great – they’re just more conservative when it comes to education and want the best for all their grandchildren. I guess I will have to decide how committed I am to homeschooling if it means a confrontation with my inlaws about it. I’ll keep you posted.

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2 thoughts on “Inlaws…

  1. It’s not just an eastern thing. We live in North Carolina, a state of the United States. My in-laws, as well as my own family, tried to gang up on us (metaphorically speaking) in an effort to push us into placing our daughter in public schools. Here in our area, public schools are punishing children for publicly following Jesus and we don’t want that kind of environment for our exceptionally bright child. Also, the schools have a tendency to hold gifted kids back and push challenged kids too much. Then there is the measure of safety. Whereas y’all are dealing with disease, around here the disease is violence. The numbers of violent acts in our state’s public schools are in the thousands. It’s just not safe. When our family tries to pressure us into placing her into a “real school,” I have to remind myself what is awaiting her if she would go. They have even went so far as to purchase workbooks for her school (that are lower than her abilities) because they don’t think we are capable of providing a better quality education than the schools. I’ve said all of this to say: You are not alone and keep it up! Do what is best for your child regardless of what anyone else says. What was best for your in-laws’ children might not be what is best for your children. These are different times and the situations have changed, whether it be violence or disease. Protect your child at all costs. That’s why God gave your son to you and not them.

    • You are so right – in-law issues can happen everywhere and yours definitely sounds similar to mine! Thanks for sharing and supporting. What’s happening in public schools is depressing – in the UK too. I have just sent in my letter to the school confirming that my son will NOT be joining on Monday. I think that’s the best thing for my son right now.

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